Saturday, May 24, 2008

Who Is Palicio D. Northrup?

Just checking emails before heading to Tucson and the 50 Year Trail. I'm taking the singlespeed and am totally stoked. Tomorrow will be Fantasy Island. It's been two years since I've ridden there and am hopping around like a two year old needing to pee in excitement. anyway, I don't know why iTunes bothers to send receipts. I can always tell when I purchase music from them by the sudden increase in spam.

Why do I get emails from Palicio D. Northrup?
Stating he can turn me into a hound from a pup
If I want the power of Niagra
Just purchase his Viagra
I just wish he wouldn’t ask me, “What’s up?”

Then there are the messages from Shanghai Alice
Who enquires to the strength of my phallus
And if I so desire
to fan women’s fire
she is happy to sell me boxes of Cialis

How to pay for these miracles is the question
I’ve sent away all the money in my possession
It has all gone to Nigeria
Based solely on the criteria
Of a general’s wife and her total discretion

Oh well, it is nice to know that these total strangers have such concern for my financial and sexual well being. I will sleep better tonight for the knowledge that such Good Samaritans still exist. But, if anyone out there happens to speak with her, can you ask the general's wife where my money is? It's been six weeks....


Anna said...

Interesting how they use the name Northrup just to confuse people into thinking it is Christian Northrup, noted doctor.

I am glad so many people care so deeply for you.

Frank said...

I am amazed how many people are so concerned for me. I found out, just today, that I am paying too much for prescription drugs, I need a real Rolex watch, and once again, Erectile Dysfunction is affecting the American male in epidemic proportions. I love iTunes and the spam it doth generate.